#metamorposis – Journey-For-Life

The Journey 1000 miles and 1000 lbs

Hi guys! Still making progress, though slow. I mentioned I haven’t been able to get to the gym to get a good bike ride in, BUT! I’ve been consistent on the treadmill all week. Four miles (at least) every day.

I completed over 25 miles this week but the page I’m on in my google maps printout has 82 miles on it. At this rate I’ll be here a while…

Couple small wins this week:

1. I consistently keep pace for ALL on Anticonformity (my 3 minute 5 mph song)

2. Several times I replayed Anticonformity at least once, one time twice, for a total of 9 minutes at 5 mph

3. I bought a bike trainer to mount my hybrid bike to so I can ride at home. However, I have to make a few axle adjustments to make it work. Plus it’s darned cold in my garage now so I haven’t ridden yet but hope to sometime this week!

4. Raspberry banana smoothies

5. Eliminated excess cardboard to the recycler.

be blessed my friends!

Thinly Veiled

Where to begin….

Yesterday, when I got home from work, a package for me was sitting on the ottoman in my family room. When I opened it, real-live paperback version of the book that was published was sitting in my hands. As I mentioned, I’ve seen the cover 1,000 times, but to touch it and flip through the pages was a righteous moment for me… and then I thought, “what if my mom see’s it?” LOL (40-something years old and afraid of what my mother will think – can anyone relate?) I mean, really, she doesn’t yet know anything about it… in the book, through fictional characters, I have laid out some of the most painful memories of my life… what if she reads it and judges me? what if she’s angry that I’ve publicly admitted my weaknesses? Could I hide it from her forever? Probably not. I was reminded of the conversation I had with the publisher when I told him my husband didn’t know about the book – he said, “well you better tell him before he sees you on the news”.

It had been terrifying for me to tell my husband, but I asked those encouraging me to pray for me.. and one night, I worked up enough courage to tell him. His response (“what was your purpose?”) caused me to deep-think how I would like to see God use this book. What seemed daunting to me ended up being a catalyst for me to change the “note from the author” (funny how life works that way sometimes).

At any rate, I decided that when my mom got home, I would simply ask her to read a book, and not tell her I was the author, since, of course, I have a pen name. She reads quickly – in fact, I believe she taught Evelyn Wood how to read back in the day! I went to a different room because I didn’t want to feel her judgement as she poured through the pages of my open heart. At one point, my daughter told me she was looking for me – but I was hiding.

After she finished the book, she came into the room where I was – I could swear there was a tear on her cheek. She said, “well, that was – WOW” I wasn’t sure if she meant WOW in a good way or a bad, so I asked her, and she said, “Good”, which I will take at face value. We talked about how my prayer is that it would reach people who are hurting and need to know God’s love.

I asked her if she was angry. She said, “Why would I be angry?” She said she knew I was the author in the first chapter – my identity is “thinly veiled”, as she put it. I asked her to keep it secret from the rest of my family. I told her they would not understand me. She agreed on both counts.

I really don’t know why I was so afraid, except to say that the pain that I experienced in my life is also pain that she experienced. I have seen how she’s handled it (well, I might add – she’s a fighter), and perhaps was afraid that dredging up old memories of pain would be difficult for her. She loves Jesus as much as I do – probably more. I believe that she will honor my prayer that God will use the message to let people know that, no matter what they’re going through in life, God is there with them and will help them through.

Many of you have already reached out to let me know your ordered your copy – thank you, thank you, thank you.

If you haven’t, and want to, please click the link below.

Order Masquerade here!

If you haven’t followed my journey, please do. I have a feeling it’s about to get real.

Have a blessed day, everyone!

Blessings, SB

New Years resolution flunky?

As January comes to a close, I wonder how many New Years resolutions are still being actively pursued. Oh, it isn’t that we don’t intend to give our best. In fact, I think, quite honestly, sometimes it’s the opposite. Sometimes in our initial zeal, we start out too aggressively, and pour everything we have into focusing on that resolution. While focus is normally a good thing, when combined with obsession, can lead to burnout. I have experienced this first hand.

My other observation, particularly with fitness goals, is this: the gym-rats art not always welcoming to the “newbies”. Even when I was a regular gym-goer as a new year began, I heard others make negative comments about new people invading their space, using “their” equipment, etc., as if it was a bad thing. I always thought we should be patting them on the back for making a healthy choice, and encouraging them to take it slow enough not to get burned out. After all, the Bible’s tells us to encourage one another, right?

In the past, when I’d become burned out on my venture, I’d simply give up, with an overwhelming feeling of failure that did little for my soul. Perhaps, instead of simply giving up, we should consider that new beginnings happen every day.

If you’re one of the zealous, New Years resolution flunkies, take heart! A new day is beginning, and a new month is about to start! So get ready! Pick yourself back up and let’s get going! I’ll be right there beside you to encourage you every step of the way!

All Things New!

Many Happy New Year Wishes, my friends! It’s a brisk, yet refreshing time-of-year when we have an opportunity to begin anew! This week, the gyms will be over-crowded with people determined to begin reaching their fitness goals; the storage shops are full of people determined to get organized; the travel websites are visited by people intending to travel more this year; the financial sites are full of people looking to spend less and save more this year – all worthy goals.

Several years ago, as the calendar year before came to a close, I made a resolution to fix absolutely everything that was wrong in my life. My resolution that year was to: 1) get in shape spiritually 2) get in shape physically 3) get in shape financially 4) fix every broken relationship in my life. I was earnest in my desires – I really was! And I started like gangbusters, spending at least an hour in the gym every day, an hour doing devotionals, time balancing my checkbook, and trying to reach out to improve every single relationship in my life. Looking back at it now, it seems ridiculously pie-in-the-sky to make such unrealistic and unachievable goals, but at the time, I genuinely wanted to improve every area of my life! It’s not an unworthy goal; just an unrealistic one.

Within about 6 weeks, I completely burned out on all of them. I had to force myself to regroup and focus on ONE area while making smaller, incremental improvements in the other areas. I didn’t STOP working other areas, but I found it was not very practical to make leaps-and-bounds improvements in EVERY area of life.

I focused first on my spiritual life and began to live my life more intentionally seeking God’s will and plan for my life. As I did that, I found the other areas fell more into line with His teaching. As I focused on Him, my compassion for others grew. I continued to tithe; in fact, I increased my tithe, and He poured out blessings. I began to budget in a way to make Dave Ramsey proud. I eventually got my physical self into shape, but then became complacent and let myself go. It’s time, once again, to get on the bandwagon; this time, a few years later, a few years wiser (hopefully); a few miles closer to Him.

What I learned since my last go-round – to bring God into EVERYTHING we do, putting Him first and allowing everything else to fall into place is certainly a much better recipe for success. He makes ALL THINGS NEW!

Metamorphosis

In the quietness of this morning, as I reflect on God’s mercy, I’m filled with Gratitude that He loves me enough not to leave me where He found me. You see, somewhere along the way, I realized that I didn’t like who I had become. I knew that. I knew I wanted to change, to become something new, but I didn’t know how to start.

I was reminded of a butterfly, that emerges a beautiful creature from a cuccoon. They start a creepy caterpillar 🐛 rather disgusting to look at.

In their initial state, they seemingly bring no value. Their cocoon state is even uglier

But when they emerge from their cocoon, they are a beautiful new creature, with new abilities and a brand new outlook on life.

God is so cool that way! He takes what is seemingly of no value, and breathes new life into it, shaping it into what He intended all along.

If you are feeling like an ugly caterpillar today, the good news is that you do not have to stay where you are. If you are willing, He will take and shape you into a beautiful new creature with a new outlook on life!

For me, the first step was to acknowledge that I wasn’t who I wanted to be. I found role models who exhibited traits I admired and began to emulate. I Asked God to begin shaping me into who He wants me to be and began to listen for His voice. Spending time in His Word helped to fill me with new perspectives, and slowly I began to emerge from my cocoon of self doubt into a new creature. I know that the metamorphosis is not complete but will continue to evolve as I allow Him to continue to shape me in His image. For that, I am eternally grateful to the One who allows me to change.

Blessings,

New International Version Philippians 1:6

being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus