Do we kick them down? Do we help them up?
Domino’s
Recent series of events in my life have utterly confused me and I’ve been looking to see God’s purpose in them. Having seen the way God has worked other things in my life, I am convinced that these events have a meaning and a bigger purpose than me, though I have not figured it out yet, and they’ve really thrown me for a loop. I’ve been told to simply keep being obedient to what God is asking of me and it will eventually become clear. I am doing my best to be obedient, though, in truth, have sometimes failed.
For the past few weeks, our pastor has talked about knowing the will of God – how perfect under the circumstances (Coincidence?). Yesterday, we continued the series. There were several passages we explored, but overall, it was a light bulb moment for me. Here’s the crux of the message.
Seeking to do God’s will leads to Gods will being done in the lives of others, which leads to God’s will being done in the lives of others, and so on, and so on.
One of the passages we read was the story of the woman at the well. You can read the story yourself here: Woman at the well story but for those who prefer a summary, Jesus (a Jew) came into the town of Samaria and sent his disciples away to get food. In Samaria, at mid-day, he found a woman drawing water from a well and engaged in conversation with her – this was not socially accepted since he was a Jew and she was a Samarian and because she had a bad reputation, which is why she was drawing water at mid-day. Despite all of this, Jesus asks her to give him a drink of water, and tells her that and tells her that He can give her water so that she’d never thirst again. He asks her to bring her husband back and she replies that she has no husband. He tells her he knows she’s had five husbands and living with a man who is not her husband. She realizes he is a prophet and goes to tell the town she has seen the Messiah, and they begin to come out to see Him. Just then the disciples returned and asked Jesus what he was doing, and ask him to eat some food. John 4:34 Jesus replies, “My food is to do the will of the Father who sent me”.
In another passage, in John 9, Jesus heals a blind man, and his disciples asked whether it was his parents who sinned or he who sinned that cause his blindness.
John 9:3“Neither this man nor his parents sinned,” said Jesus, “but this happened so that the works of God might be displayed in him. “
By Jesus obeying the will of the Father, this man was able to fulfill the work that he was designed to do.
And in hearing this, I am more convinced that my purpose right now in several lives is to help them fulfill Gods purpose in their lives… “maybe that’s why the devil works so hard to keep us from it”
Wow. That’s heavy
I see my failures before me and know that the devil doesn’t want me to do God’s will because he doesn’t want God’s will to be done by others. I am laying all of it down at the feet of Jesus, asking for forgiveness for my sins, seeking His will in every aspect of my life.
I would like to ask all of you who are reading this blog now to pray for me and with me – for me to be obedient and to not allow the devil to confuse me and my purpose; with me for the people who God has placed in my life to guide, so that the will of God might be done in their lives also.
Blessings,
SB
If you’re willing to pray with me and for me, please comment, or send me a message, text, etc, to let me know – I would really appreciate it. Thank you.
Oh. My. Goodness.
Hahaha. If there’s ever a time I begin to doubt what God is doing in my life, smack me upside the head.
My subscription to Audible provides one credit a month to purchase an audio book. I started listening to books about a year ago, while I drive or bike or other monotonous activities. I never quite know what to call “experiencing” an audio book – do you “read” them? not exactly… .do you “listen”? well, yes, but somehow that isn’t a complete description either… at any rate, this is where I have experienced Mark Batterson’s books. (In a pit with a lion on a snowy day, Lion Chaser, The Circle Maker, etc). I thought I had seen all of his titles, but when perusing the library this morning looking for a new book, I came across a new one, and it’s title captured my attention immediately. Soul Print. It reminded me of Erwin McManus book, Artisan Soul, which is another life-defining book for me. Since I have 2 credits right now, I looked for a second title and came across Francis Chan, Waiting on God, which I thought was appropriate in my year of WAIT.
As I climbed on my bike a few days ago, in my F-R-E-E-Z-I-N-G cold garage to conquer some miles, I looked at both titles on my ap. In my head I was thinking, I really should begin Waiting on God, but for some reason, my heart was telling me to start with Mark Batterson, so I followed my heart.
How God knew I needed to hear the words penned by Mark is a testimony to what an awesome God He is. I wish I could simply post the entirety of Chapter 1 here, though I’m not even sure it would have the same impact on you as it did on me today. All I can say is. Holy. Cow. What a wonderful, wonderful God He is.
God is at work here, for a purpose that is soooo much bigger than me. soooo much bigger than you… sooooo much bigger. we are a part of it.
I’ve been thinking about what to study next, and thinking about how many things I’ve messed up on in my life, just like David, who God calls a man after His own heart. One thing that I’ve noticed is that the Bible is full of people who have screwed up royally, but God uses in powerful ways to further His Kingdom and His Sovereign will. I’ve decided to begin to study more about the life of David and his Psalms to understand how he could have messed up so badly, yet God loved him so much and used him so much. I haven’t started yet. Woven throughout the book, Soul Print? Stories about David – the things he did well and the things he didn’t. How funny is that?
For me, starting this book is affirmation that God is leading… I am following. I truly love God and want to do what He wants. I’m laying my entire universe at His feet right now, trusting in what He says!
I mentioned the phrase that I’ve read in some of Batterson’s other books in my previous post – that God wants to get us where God wants us to be more than we want to get where God want’s us to be.. and it was repeated several times in Soul Print. However, in addition, Mark added a new phrase that stood out to me in this book: God will not put us where He wants us until we have become who He want’s us to become.
“Your uniqueness is a testament to the God who created you. There is nothing that God cannot do in you and through you if you simply yield to Him.. All of you to All of Him. You were created to worship God in a way that no one else can, but living a life that no one else can.. You play an irreplaceable role in God’s destiny – but it starts with understanding your true identity. Our true identities get buried under the mistakes we’ve made, the insecurities we’ve acquired and the lies we believe. We’re held captive by others’ expectations and spend too much energy trying to be who ewe are not.. and we forfeit our spiritual birthright. It’s not that we are lying to ourselves; somewhere along the way, we lose ourselves… if you are still breathing, God has not given up on you yet, so don’t give up on yourself. It’s never too late to be who you might have been. ”
“The key to fulfilling your future destiny is in understanding your past…. while you live forward, God works backward… all of your days are ordained by God and it’s your responsible to discover your God-given destiny.. despite humble beginnings and huge mistakes, David fulfilled his destiny. … in the pages that follow, we will dissect David’s life in such a way as to help you find your destiny.”
“I don’t know how long you’ve been stuck, but I know that God wants to move you. We are held captive by so many things… by our imperfections and insecurities, guilt and anxiety, expectations, and lies, and mistakes. Jesus dies to set us free from all of the above, not just to set us free from who we were but to set us free for who we were intended to be.”
“God’s primary concern is who you are becoming – the character of Christ being formed in you until you are more like Jesus – as a revelation of who God is. You won’t find yourself until you find God. You are made in His image. To become like Christ is to become unlike anyone else.”
Mark Batterson, Soul Print
I’ve finished listening to the book (the advantage of spending hours on a bike and in a car this week!). I’d encourage you to read the book – you can find it here… Soul Print
Be blessed, my friends!
SB
If you like what you read, please FOLLOW my blog!
Copyright 2019 Journey For Life. All rights reserved.
Life is complicated
A friend of mine posted an article on Facebook the other day – it was the picture and caption that first caught my attention – it said, “I quit Christianity when I found out my pastor was banging his secretary and stealing money.” Of course, that intrigued me to read more… it went on to talk about all of the judgmental Christians who had tried to impose “rules” on the author – and very often those who were preaching it were not infallible, and, in fact, had committed some pretty big sins even by non-Christian standards.
It went on to talk about how he then met two individuals who changed his opinion forever – people who weren’t afraid to be real about their struggles and their failures and didn’t pretend to have all of the answers. When he saw their authenticity, he wanted what they had…. not a perfect life, but a relationship with a loving God who loves them 100% where they are and is patient with them as they fail time and time again. My favorite quote in his blog was this: “So why am I a Christian? Because I know I’m a train wreck in a dumpster fire. But I also know that God loves me 100% as is, right now, in the midst of the burning carnage that is my life….. God is cheering for me as I get better and especially when I fall down. Where I see failure, He see’s an opportunity for growth. Where I see addiction, he sees an opportunity to take a step. Where I’ve given up, he whispers, “you can make it'”
One of the things I’ve been wrestling with lately is living up to expectations… in my year of WAIT, I find myself going over and over in my mind the many times I have failed and sinned… and think about the burning carnage that is my life. Sometimes I think about how ill-equipped I am to work with others to show them Jesus when I’ve failed so many times myself, and then I remember that is precisely the reason God send Jesus to us, and I feel like the Christian in this article.
Last week in our youth group we studied the passage in Matthew 18:21-23 – Then Peter came to Jesus and asked, ‘How many time should I forgive my brother or sister who sin against me? Up to seven times?’ Jesus answered, “I tell you not seven, but seventy times seven”
His answer wasn’t a literal 490 times, but figurative to mean that we are to continue to forgive those who sin against us just as God continually forgives us who sin against Him. Being a Christian doesn’t make us perfect – not by any stretch of the imagination – it only makes us forgiven. Sure, we try to live a life that is pleasing to Him, but He already knows we are imperfect, and loves us every time we fail.
Every time we fall down, He is there to pick us up, dust us off and say, “let’s try this again”
For me, that is the picture of Christianity I want to follow – i have messed up plenty. His grace is greater. I am forever thankful for a God who has never given up on me… and will never give up on you.
Blessed beyond words,
SB
You can see the whole post here:
Chasing Lion’s
Years ago, I shared a life-goal with a friend of mine. A lofty goal and a seemingly crazy idea, I dreamed the dream and quickly dismissed it – only to have the idea resurface many times over the past ten or so years. Last year, in a flurry of activity that could have seen my dream realized (at least partially), I reached out to that same friend to get his opinion on some of the things that were going on, partially to validate my thoughts and partially to have someone objective evaluate the circumstances. His response to me was this:
“You are a lion-chaser”
I wasn’t sure if it was a compliment or not. He recommended a book to me, called, In a pit with a lion on a snowy day. At first, I thought the title ridiculous, but bought the book anyway. After the first paragraph, I was hooked. Since that book, I’ve probably read seven or eight more of Mark Batterson’s books, including The Lion-Chaser, The Circle Maker, and Whisper, among others.
In a Pit starts with a reference to an obscure passage of the Old Testament, 1 Chronicles 11:22, Benaiah the son of Jehoiada, the son of a valiant man of Kabzeel, who had done mighty deeds, he slew the two’sons of Ariel of Moab: he went down also and slew a lion in the midst of a pit in time of snow.”
Mark Batterson describes in detail the courage and tenacity Benaiah had to chase a lion into a pit. He drew it out with tremendous suspense the way a great author would, leaving the reader feeling like they’re watching a suspenseful movie, anxiously waiting to see who emerged from the pit, cheering loudly when they see it’s Benaiah. The subtitle of the book is, “How to survive and thrive when opportunity roars” Most of Mark’s books deal with having Jericho sized dreams and seizing opportunity to achieve them.
Here’s an excerpt:
“God is in the business of strategically placing us in the right place at the right time – a sense of destiny is our birthright as followers of Christ; God is awfully good at getting us where He wants us to go – but here’s the catch – the right place often seems like the wrong place, and the right time often seems like the wrong time”.
“God is always using past experiences to prepare us for future opportunities, but those opportunities often come disguised as man-eating lions – how we react to those lions will determine our destiny – we can cower in fear and run away from our biggest challenges, or we can seize our God-given opportunities. The greatest opportunities are the scariest lions. “
One of my favorite lines from his book – and I believe it’s been repeated in several of his books is this: “God wants you to get where God wants you to go more than you want to get where God wants you to go.” It sounds like a strange statement, but when I step back and look some of the experiences I’ve had, and experiences that friends of mine have had, and realize the wisdom gained from those experiences that wouldn’t have been gained without going through them, I can see God strategically working things out, opening and closing doors, to get people where they need to be.
It is exciting. And terrifying. And fun. All at the same time.
I’ve thought long and hard about my friends’ statement over the past year. I decided it was a compliment to be called a lion-chaser, and believe there is some truth in his statement; however, there are a few things in my life holding me back just a bit from being “all in”. Some of those things I’m able to articulate, and some I’m still discovering. Risk is a lot easier to take when you’re the only one involved – but I’m in an interesting life-stage right now with both children and parent depending on me – most practical people would say now is not the time to take a risk – but maybe in a few years when two of the three kids are out of college… and then I re-read the quote above (“the right place often seems like the wrong place and the right time often seems like the wrong time”) and I wonder if I’m missing the opportunity.
Last spring, as I was reading Mark Batterson’s books and working through some of my details, I sent an email to Mark Batterson to thank him for writing the books he had, never expecting to hear anything back. To my surprise, I had several email exchanges with his administrative assistant in which I shared some of what I was going through – she put me on the prayer chain of NCC Church in Washington, DC, where Mark pastors over 6,000 people, and has reached out several times since just to check how things are going. What an incredibly humbling experience.
When God asked me if I was willing to tell my story (summer of 2017), I immediately responded with, “Of course, I am – but wait, what story? I don’t really have a story.” Since that first step of obedience saying I’m willing to share my story, I believe He is giving me a story to tell. It’s not quite done yet. But one thing’s for sure – it will be amazing when it is..
I truly believe that when God sees we are willing to step out in obedience to Him, he blesses us in ways we could never, ever, imagine in 100 million years. I am living proof of that. I am 100% confident that God is still in control and He is preparing some wonderfully crazy things for my life and the lives of those who love Him. I’m learning to enjoy the wait. (ok, “enjoy” might be a strong word…. how about “embrace” the wait… ?)
Be blessed, my friends, be blessed.
Thanks for stopping by!
SB
Shabby Love
I’ve always loved big old Victorian houses with creaky floors and crooked doors. When we were first married and talking about buying a home, I suggested my grandparents home, which was a three story home with grand pocket doors and ornate woodwork. He said NO.
I am drawn to vintage items with lots of wear and tear. In fact, the rustier, more dented and distressed, (except on my piano) the better. Then one day, while perusing Pinterest, I discovered that style had a name. “Shabby Chic”, popularized by designer, Rachel Ashwell. Instantly in love, I spent the next several years updating our decor to incorporate antiques and items with chippy layered painted, repurposing old doors and thrift store finds, and sanding woodwork to give it a natural distressed feel. Turns out others like it too as the phenomenon has entered all of the coolest home stores across America. Most of those items are manufacturers, though, and most of mine are true vintage.
For a look at previous shabby, chalk painted project, see Restoration through Craigslist
The picture below is the set of closet doors in our Master Bedroom that I finished this fall (ideas from Pinterest). You’ll notice the distressed shiplap wall behind the door – inspired by Joanna Gaines, it gives our bedroom a nice old cottage feel to it – comfortable and lived in, just like me. Our bedroom update was done just this past summer, and I truly love how peaceful it feels now. The doors were a Craigslist find a few years ago, and I knew what I’d do with them evenually – they needed stained and painted with several layers of paint, then polished with dark furniture polish to give them an “aged” appearance. I love the way they turned out. (Incidentally, the dresser beside the doors is also a Craigslist fine – a set of two that I “reburbished” and aged this past summer – I also love the way they turned out..
Below are some of the antique and distressed items I’ve collected, many of them on Craigslist, some in resale and antique shops, and some from my own family. Everyone has an old “explosives” box, right? And a finger-joint music box? The scrolled corner shelf and mirror were from my grandfathers house. The tea cups were moms, and their display stand came from my favorite resale shop in Greensburg, PA. The loveseat (adorned with my dog below) was a Craigslist find that was originally an olive green and maroon brocade. Rather than reupholstering (which seemed daunting), I dyed it brown, which turned the shades of olive and maroon into various shades of brown. I love the way it turned out.
In my laundry room hangs an antique ironing board. When it was given to me, it was covered in tattered fabric which I removed. Upon removing the fabric, I discovered the wonderful burn mark deep into the wood! It was glorious, and I made up a story in my head that accompanied the burn! I knew instantly I’d have to make something special with it to hang in my laundry room! Because I’m good at spilling food on my clothes, I settled in the on the saying I painted:
The shelf below I made for my sons room when he was a baby. One of his baby blankets used to hang from it. I’ve repurposed it in our bedroom and set the wooden advice board on it, along with the fleur de lis set I found at an antique shop in West Virginia and the jade glass vases I found at Goodwill. 
For me, this shabby chic style was “love at first sight”, I believe mostly because I connected with it. This style hollers,
“IMPERFECT”
which describes me to a T. It shouts, “fix me up!” and “make me new”, and that’s just what God did with me. Oh, I’m far from perfect, like the items in my house, but my dents and scratches, bruises and scars give me character (at least I like to think so). But like the items in my house that each have a story to tell, I can share my mistakes and bumps and bruises with others to encourage them or help them along their way.
Shabby but happy, be blessed today, my friends!
SB
How the battle is won…
“The battle is won twice – the first time in your mind”
I can’t take credit for the above quote, but it is so freaking profound and it applies to absolutely everything in my life. Literally, every time I start a workout, I have to battle my mind, multiple times, for different reasons throughout the entire process. The first group of battles occurs before the first step of the workout…
THE BATTLE OF THE FIRST STEP
- The first battle is TIME.. I know this workout is going to take 50-60 minutes… that’s an HOUR of a day…(not counting stretch time, which I cheat sometimes, and shower time after the workout) and in the life of someone ridiculously busy, that’s a long time, so I have to battle myself. It’s easy to an outside observer to say, “easy… all you have to do is look at it like a 60 minute investment in your health”… ok, I get that.. but (just being honest), in real life, that isn’t necessarily the argument that wins the battle.
- A split second behind TIME is, COLD. Since my bike trainer and bike are in my garage, and, in western PA, it’s winter (and a very cold one at that), there’s something unappealing about being cold.. but the truth is, when I wear a hoodie and leggings, I’m chilly for the first .5 mile and then I actually get hot biking, so it’s an invalid argument that my mind tries to make up.
So how do people combat these battles to get started? For me, it’s simply brute force…. just do it. Don’t think too long about it, just do it…
THE IN-PROCESS BATTLE
- The next battle is perhaps FATIGUE? It usually occurs about 20 minutes in… on about the 4th song of my playlist if I’m listening to it (sometimes when I ride the bike, I listen to podcasts instead – to kill two birds with one stone). It’s about this point that I start to think, “ok, has it been long enough…really?” The weapon I use here is to trick myself into just listening to one more song… and then about the time I get to Anitconformity, my mood changes – probably because of the pace of the song. After the song, then I’m in “I can do this” mode, and I’m usually good for the remainder of the workout, until..
- The last in-process battle occurs in the very last .25 of the workout… especially when watching the computer on the stationary bike or treadmill. I can’t explain it, but for some reason, the last quarter mile seems to be so much longer than all of the rest, it literally feels like watching a pot of water boil. Probably only my doggedness gets me through this battle.
When I’m finished, and I can chalk some miles up to my journey, I’m always glad I did it.
THE BATTLE OF PROGRESS
On a larger scale than the daily workout, if I am honest, there is a longer-term battle I fight with myself that asks, “is what you’re doing even making a difference?” It’s difficult to see daily progress, not only in physical workouts, but in other areas of life as well. Sometimes it’s necessary to stop what you’re doing, look around and see how far you’ve come.
They say (whoever “they” are) that it takes 4 weeks of working out for you to notice a difference in yourself – 8 weeks for close friends to notice and 12 weeks for the rest of world to notice… so keep at it… Rome wasn’t build in a day.
When you’re thinking about quitting, just remember this…
Crying Out…
Deep, deep within the innermost depths of my soul lies a darkness so black it suffocates.
Of anything I’ve ever written, this is my absolute favorite. To be honest, I think it’s because, without realizing it when I wrote it, it so perfectly describes who I am at my very core… someone who desperately wants to help other people find themselves, but is so desperately broken myself.
In the darkness of this world, we all so desperately need Jesus. Without Him, I’d still be the person in the poem. But for God, I’d still be in the forest.
Click the link below to go to the original post:
Blessings,
SB
Copyright 2019 Journey For Life. All rights reserved
All that we see or seem…
Edgar Allan has long been my absolute favorite American writer – I think I fell in love with his work in late elementary school, perhaps early junior high. A tragic life, his works are drenched with his darkness, which intrigues me to understand his psyche. Somehow, at times, I feel a deep connection to that darkness.
My favorite Poe work has always been Annabel Lee, a poem about true love that was separated prematurely through death. However, of late, I find myself connecting most with this work, which I’ve included below, that you might enjoy as well..
His soul cried out…
A Dream Within a Dream
Take this kiss upon the brow!
And, in parting from you now,
Thus much let me avow —
You are not wrong, who deem
That my days have been a dream;
Yet if hope has flown away
In a night, or in a day,
In a vision, or in none,
Is it therefore the less gone?
All that we see or seem
Is but a dream within a dream.
I stand amid the roar
Of a surf-tormented shore,
And I hold within my hand
Grains of the golden sand —
How few! yet how they creep
Through my fingers to the deep,
While I weep — while I weep!
O God! Can I not grasp
Them with a tighter clasp?
O God! can I not save
One from the pitiless wave?
Is all that we see or seem
But a dream within a dream?
The journey -the US tour and century ride
Hey, guys! Just a refresher about my fitness goals for the year…. to exercise enough miles this year to virtually tour across the US… NYC to LA.. accompanied by my playlist, I cover 4 miles on a treadmill in just under an hour. At that rate, it’s going to take a long time to travel across the US.
At the suggestion of a friend, I ordered two bike trainers from Amazon (one for me and one for my daughter). This adds biking at home to my repertoire since recent life events prevent me from spending quality/quantity time at the gym.
The trainers came with a quick release axle to mount my bikes axle to the trainer. The problem was that we don’t have quick release axles, so I thought I had to convert my bolt axle to a quick release. Turns out I don’t. I was able to simply take my back wheel and mount it right into the trainer and ride! (Not that I learned this after taking our rear wheels to the bike shop….;-)
So in the same time I can cover 4 miles on the treadmill, I can cover 16 miles on the bike. This will not only help me rack up some miles, but get the “seat” time my friend told me would be necessary toward my second goal… the “century” ride.. (or half century ride as is my current goal).
The Century Ride is a 100 mile bike ride we’re doing as a fundraiser for an upcoming missions trip to NYC this June. The ride is on June 8, my daughters birthday (she’s pretty excited about it. 😂). While I think 100 miles in one day may be a bit out of my league, my goal will be to join the team at the 50 mile mark and ride to the end. Others may join at the 25 mile mark if they want, and all the missions trip kids will join at the 10 mile mark if they haven’t joined before.
We got our bike trainers set up on Saturday and I rode the first 15 miles! I will say it’s pretty chilly in my garage right now as our temps in Western PA are below freezing. We’re expecting an arctic blast this week to take us below zero. (Yay!). However, with the right gear (which is more than a t shirt) and a few tenths of a mile and ya warm up!
I’m expecting to finally get off of me “Allentown” page this week. There are 81.76 miles on the page itself which will bring my total to about 182.71 by the time I finish the page.
And… as one who remembers when MTV first came out, I was super excited to find this workout T shirt at Walmart a few weeks ago!
I have 34 miles to go to get to Harrisburg. Hopefully I’ll get there by Tuesday or Wednesday.. I’m somewhere around 150 miles of my 2700 mile goal… on page 5 of 42 pages of google map printout.
Here’s to another week at it.
Just a couple of side notes I’ve observed… the whole workout thing generates more laundry… helps you sleep well (unless your dog wakes you) and leaves you feeling better overall.
Be blessed, my friends!
SB
Journey-For-Life 